Why? You ask, was PrissE awake at 7:59 AM......Yes. All Queens of the Universe should be asleep at such an absurdly profane time of morning!! 5:13 AM. Me. Snoozing ever so pleasantly. 5:14 AM. Me. Searing pain radiating from my nose. Head spinning. Dry-heaving. Red, icky stuff running from the searing pain place on the center of my face........WTH?!?!
Apparently, Mr. A (and today maybe the 'A' doesn't stand for 'analytical'), rolled over, threw an elbow, and caught me squarely on the right side of my nose. And....we all know what happens to fragile PrissE when she sustains a blow to the preciously petite nose!
Side Story: long, long ago...in a much different world...our dear PrissE peered into a mirror to admire her newly acquired leotard for her first ever gymnastics exhibition meet. Our dear PrissE, even at the tender age of only 6, was quite a tumbling vision to behold in the bathroom counter mirror when, to her horror, she went tumbling into the bathtub on whose side she'd been standing to be tall enough to peer into yon bathroom counter mirror!! Aesop might say that it is not prudent to wear tights with one's new leotard if one is going to stand on the side of the slippery bathtub. One might slip into the tub and bang one's lovely petite nose on the tub faucet, forever after being completely intolerant of even the slightest graze to one's button nose!!
5:16ish AM (give or take a few minutes....my vision was still a touch blurry, so I couldn't read the clock in the kitchen so well), I'm administering my own first aid: frozen water bottle wrapped in a dish towel, some Tylenol, and a box of tissue to stuff up my nose. It really wasn't a big deal. It only took about an hour for the bleeding to completely stop....maybe that's just me being a touch 'dramatic'.....wanting the bleeding to 'completely' stop and all.....
Mr. A?? Where was he in all of this (especially since medical aid IS his field of expertise)?? Soundly and fast asleep. Me?? On the couch, holding a frozen-dish-towel-wrapped-water-bottle to my nose, and shoving Puffs Plus up my nostril! Note to self--when needing tissue to stuff up self's nose in order to stop bleeding, Puffs Plus with Menthol is NOT recommended.
Me + Tragic Accident = Tiiiiiiiinnnnyyy Bruise.
Me + Sleeping Dog Who I Let Lie Even Though He Threw an Elbow and Caught Me in the Face = Stuffy Nose, Slight Headache, and NOT A MARK ON ME!!!!! WHAT I GOTTA DO TO LOOK A VICTIM?!?!
Swimming Today!!! *fingers crossed!!*
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just as funny today, as in the original email!
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