Tuesday, December 15, 2009

'Tis the Season!

Pull up a cozy chair, grab your favorite comforting drink, crawl under your blanket and get ready for a Christmas tale to remember....

MOVE over all you Mall-Rats!

WATCH out you Wal-Martians!!

TURN & RUN all you Target Tourists!!!

Because......here comes CHRISTMAS CAROL--Shopping Diva!!!

You know the lady....she's the one who cut you off on the access road so that SHE can pull into the parking lot first!

She's the one who nearly mowed over Granny Mabel and her walker-basket combo as she exited the store...all for the "best parking spot" she could find!

CHRISTMAS CAROL is the one who stands huffing & puffing & making that tongue-clicking sound in irritation whilst standing with her left hand planted firmly on her protruding left hip.....she CANNOT see through you to choose the best Lizard Larry action pack for her precious little Edward Elf!  After all, her baby boy deserves the best!  Never mind that you did grace the aisle a full 1 minute 37 seconds BEFORE Carol--AND, you have your basket scooted over on the right side of aisle appropriately and legally, according to Section 1.7C of the Texas Shoppers Ethics Code (or TxShEC for short!  OK.  So I made up the section #...but, y'all, the shoppers' ethics ARE implied!).

Oooh!  A new checkout lane opens and you're next to be called over by the sultry sound of the uncharacteristically happy cashier's words:
     "Ma'am.  I can get you over here."
...Only to be basket-banged by none other than--you guessed it!--CHRISTMAS Carol!  She does have a wildly busy schedule, y'all!!

Don't Fret, my friend!!  'Tis the Season...

Just then, the preciously-angelic & heaven-sent cashier monologues to CHRISTMAS Carol:
     "Ma'am.  I must object to your most recent action and ask you to step aside for this lady whom I just called.  She was to be first in this line.  
     "You see, I saw you cut her off on the access road when pulling into the parking lot.  I was right behind her pulling in, myself and I never heard her even honk at you."

     "I then watched you nearly kill an elderly pedestrian with a walker as she exited our store, simply so you could illegally park on the diagonal yellow lines in between handicapped & general parking.  That was when I decided to monitor and observe you in our store, in case security might be needed."

     "I watched you, once more, inflict your 'air of entitlement' on this lady on a toy aisle.  Yet, she never returned the rudeness.  Instead, I heard her say 'Oh. Excuse me,' when she realized you were exasperated."

     "But this is the straw that broke this camel's back, Ma'am.  Now you've made actual physical contact by bumping her basket with yours so she'd stop and you could push on through.  You know what I heard this lady say to you then?  Nothing.  No complaint, no gripe, no snide remark.  Nothing.

     "I can tell you what Christmas means to many of our shoppers just by observing their Christmas shopping behaviors.  Christmas, to you Ms. Carol, is all about you and yours...what OTHERS can do for you.  Christmas to this lady, however, is about the consideration, safety, welfare, and happiness of others.  In a word, to her Christmas is Jesus.  I can tell that SHE gets it, and you, Ms. Carol, do not."

     "So, after I check her out, I'll happy to do the same for you.  And, I hope, Ms. Carol, that when you leave here, you feel a little safer, a little happier, and a little more humbled...because, as far as I'm concerned, you and I, through this lady, have just stood in the presence of God.  You have a Merry Christmas."

Well.  Whatta ya know...Jesus can even manifest in an overly-stressed, over-worked cashier at Christmas shopping time!  That just goes to show that, even when we think no one else is watching, being the Salt and the Light to others and glorifying our Savior at all times through our actions is ever imperative!  

To whom will you show Jesus this season?  Or, will someone be showing you to Him (Thank you Angel-Cashier!!)?

Merry Christmas to All, and to All, Peaceful Shopping!!


  1. dear check out people of the world,

    Merry Christmas!


  2. I love learning lessons from Jesus in the midst of holiday shopping!

  3. Thanks for the laugh! It always good to have the checker on your side!