6. Thou shalt NOT sport an "orange glow" tan! Vitamin D & SPF are a necessity! (and it isn't fooling anyone!)
Friends, really? You cannot pull it off. Not a rub on tan, not a spray on tan, not gradual tanning lotions of any kind. It doesn't work. I'd like to present Exhibit A:
New York City in March. Brrrrrrr!!! The Bossman is a lovely shade of orange, don't you think? Spray on tan much? Not anymore!!
Note the long sleeve jacket, jeans and giant green purse. (Giant green purse was another bad fashion choice, but we'll address it in a later post.) Oh yes, and the lovely orange glow. Never fear people, the entire rest of my body was the same lovely orange glow, you just can't see it because New York City in March is cold!
The VERY NEXT NIGHT, we attended our first formal dinner on the cruise. Notice our natural glow after approximately one super hot shower and two loofahs each. Even we noticed the super UN-natural way we were glowing, and made the good decision to wash that glow down the drain. Thank heavens for 20/20 vision and a level head. I'm not even all that green from sea sickness..... yet. It was still early in the week. Sea sickness, to the extreme was waiting for me later on.
Blog stalkers, it's almost May. I know you all want to wear shorts, Capri's and tube tops..... go ahead and do it, but please..... don't give in to the temptation to spray on, rub on, or gradual lotion on an orange glow tan!