Monday, January 11, 2010

Dear Rockin' Rack

Dear Rockin' Rack,

Wonder Twin Powers Activate!  Form of, "DON'T BE JEALOUS because mine are REAL!"  I completely hear you, gurl and can ToTaLlY empathize!!  Loving the skin you're in is NOT optional in a diva's life!

First and foremost:  Diva gives props to anyone and every one who support the causes that help to "stamp out disease!"  So, to the clerk who "checked you out" at the register--and was sporting jewelry to support his fave cause--I say PROPS!


Now, to the aforementioned clerk who should've "checked you out," but very obviously had a seizure that prevented him from performing his obligations of support:

"Dude!  If you so choose to support a cause by purchasing and showcasing it's merchandise,
yet you feel the desperate need to guiltily justify your choice upon receiving 'attention' for said merchandise, be prepared for me to whip out my Drama Diva Pink Hanky (these are exclusive 'thank you's to those who have 'fanned, followed, and submitted letters to' TftC specifically seeking Diva's advice) --adorned with a beautifully hand-beaded inscription:  "I wipe 'DEER IN THE HEADLIGHTS' looks off of dumb boys' faces!"--and wipe that "OMG!  How do I justify my testosterone-fueled-stupidity!" look off of your face!


Miss Rockin', we Divas have a social & fashionably forward responsibility to the general public to hold each and every fashion-career-salesperson accountable for his/her own accessory choices (as duly noted in the official 'Diva Handbook in *Section: Ethical Responsibilities; +Subsection: Fashion Responsibilities')!  We would be completely remiss if we ignored poor accessory choices/justifications and allowed those "in the profession" to unsafely accessorize or promote unsafe accessorization" to their customer base!  We MUST not fear our accessories and the statements they make!  It's just bad business!


In conclusion, Miss Rockin', because of your bold inquiry of a perfectly reasonable fashion accessory and a total understanding of the perpetrator's misuse & misrepresentation of his cause-support, I give you Drama Diva's Approval to apply for your "Fashion Standards" certificate, subsequently allowing you to move on to working toward your certification in "Social Graces."  CONGRATS, Diva-in-training!!  You are on your way to being "the complete package!"


*Smootch!*      

2 comments:

  1. that is some sound advice!! never fear your accessories!! :)

    what shall i wear to the graduation ceremony?? there must be some dress code to accepting your social graces certification.

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  2. remaining upright! no high heels for you!

    ReplyDelete